I interviewed Evonne Lek who is a dedicated family therapist who left public service so as to better serve her clients. 1) What do you do? I am a family therapist, more specifically a systemic psychotherapist. I help couples, families, parents and individuals resolve their relationship issues.
As a marriage counsellor, I think it's important to review and recommend books that can help couples who are struggling. John Gottman's The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work is very useful for helping couples work through their problems. It's easy to read, it has some great advice, and it also has questionnaires and practical exercises that couples can work on together.
Many couples I see get caught up in conflict, but most do not realise that differences in how they are attached to one another play a big part in these conflicts. In psychology we call these different types of 'attachment styles'.
My letter to The Straits Times Forum, Help children cope with emotions , was published online on 9/11/16. I wrote to the newspaper as I am deeply concerned about the level of distress that I see in young Singaporeans. Teenagers regularly contact me in distress and ask for help.
Letters on the Web News -I read with sadness that an 11-year-old boy killed himself on the day he was supposed to bring his exam results home ("Death of boy who fell 17 floors ruled a suicide"; Oct 22).. Read more at straitstimes.com.
We depend on a trusting relationship with loved ones to enable us to venture into the uncertainty of the world. However, Western society used to advocate distant and detached parenting so that children became independent as soon as possible. This idea changed to acknowledge the importance of attachment, where a child needs ongoing, reassuring emotional connection with its parents.